A Whole Year of Updates (5/5)

It started last year, almost a year ago. I felt my career was getting stagnant. I sent emails to companies I wished to work for and fortunately received positive responses from a few. In October, I moved to Siemens. Totally different. I easily adapted to the quirkyness and love for pancit of my colleagues.

Siemens had been my home. I drowned myself with work. Before, if I felt going home then I did. But here, I would come in between 7 or 8 in the morning and leave 12 hours after. Less Facebook and Twitter.

February of this year, the boyfriend and I moved to a new apartment with Alex, a friend. Our Saturdays were spent on the rooftop over beer and kwentuhan. On Sundays, we'd go to Binondo to eat at Wai Ying's or drive to Tagaytay for their famous bulalo at the meat market.

To sum, I have a really good job, new house and my tummy is well fed. BUT, I feel empty. I want to be satisfied but I do not know what for. Perhaps pressure is getting on me. Friends are getting married and having babies. Some are enjoying the greener pastures. Some are just a year less from graduating in law school. Thing is I do not want to get married yet, all the more I do not want to carry the bump. My ambition to go to London has been forgotten but my fancy over anything English will never be over.

On Getting Married. I love weddings. I daydream of my own wedding - the beach, chucks, football field for the AVP, 90s OPM, matching tattoos, doing my own make-up, the entourage, name it. I envy a lot of my friends who are getting hitched. They seem so happy, all prepared and excited to finally become one. The boyfriend and I talk about it too. We have the same ideas and of course, excited. BUT, financially we are not yet ready. AND perhaps, emotionally too on my part. I want to achieve A LOT first. I want to go back to school, travel and build my own library. To add, the boyfriend just moved to a new company and is still establishing his own career. I keep on telling him to concentrate on his performance at work and that I will understand if he has less time for me. Both our families are excited for us to start our own family. It's just that marriage has taken a backseat in our minds.

On Building a Career. Working in Siemens is a whole lot of fun. The girls are awesome; I learned to put on make-up and wear colorful skirt in the office. We've travelled out of town twice - Cebu and Bohol, both times were so much fun. The boys are funny and bastos-friendly. Hahahah! I love my boss, how he keeps his cool when the tough gets going. He throws very corny jokes and always gets us motivated - especially through food and movies. We just launched our book club after everyone got hooked on Christian Grey. Lunch and merienda are so funny even if it's just pancit canton on the table. There is nothing I can complain about.

Going Both Crazy and Happy. I have a lot of goals this year: travel around the country each month, get inked, enroll in the Open University, read more books, get engaged, shave my hair, buy an iPhone, drink with random people, party like there's no tomorrow and fall in love all over again. Next definitely to tick is to put on a real tattoo - "Saudade" the longing for something not existing.

Saudade

A Whole Year of Updates (3/5)

March 2012. The boyfriend and I were supposed to celebrate the actual fifth year together on the 18th but plans had been made with girl friends to tour Cebu. I pushed through with Cebu, enjoyed three days of sun, food, shoes and more food. Only to come back to Manila with the boyfriend mad at me.

It was my second time in Moalboal and I hoped earlier that the girls would arrange for a Camotes or Bantayan escapade. Still the same fun as last year's except that ALL the girls got drunk. Imagine six girls finishing two bottles of vodka and I-couldnt-remember-how-much bottles of beer. Everyone shared their heartaches and sorrows. It wasn't easy. Each one of us had a lot to deal with. But anyway, I wouldn't want to talk so much about this because as they said "What happens in Cebu, stays in Cebu".

The morning after.

April 2012. This month came by so fast. I couldn't remember any out of town trips except maybe for the random Tagaytay roadtrips the boyfriend and I do.

When Manila's temperature goes up and becomes unbearable, we take refuge in Tagaytay. An hour or so of driving and we're engulfed in cold air and very light atmosphere. The city boasts of scenic view of the Taal Volcano and Batangas bulalo. We preferred going to Mahogany (the meat market) than in those expensive restaurants. It felt more authentic because the karinderyas are fronting the market which sells beef only.

May 2012. My birth month. Quarter-life crisis got me a year earlier. Being 24, working in Manila, in a multinational company, having a boyfriend of five years, being far away from my family, I had a lot of questions in my mind.

The boyfriend and I had an extended misunderstanding (because I pushed through with the Cebu trip on our fifth anniversary). We weren't really arguing. We were simply drifting apart. I went out with my girl friends, shopped alone, worked myself out. He had extended hours with officemates, on beer, playing basketball and work as well. Our differences were more emphasized and seemed irreconcilable. What made it harder was the fact that we shared an apartment together. At home, we talked about nothing. We pretended there was nothing wrong with our relationship. We'd still hold hands while walking, kiss each other goodnight and hugged when he picked me up from the office. But the "I love yous" had been rare. Pretensions. Lies. Cover-ups.

Things at work were getting heavier but it was fun. My colleagues are loud, funny, perverts (hahaha), noisy, talkative and ate a lot. Pantry discussions made lunch more tasteful and pancit meriendas became venues for more adult talks.

Coping with what I call as "quarter-life crisis" will be in the next portion.



A Whole Year of Updates (1/5)

Five days to go and it would be a year since I've posted in my blog. Yes, I've been THAT busy with work, myself and everything that goes along with being 24 years old in Manila.

A lot of things happened since then. I moved to a new job, new apartment, worried over the Sendong calamity in my hometown, spent Christmas on the streets of CDO with the typhoon victims, celebrated fifth anniversary with the boyfriend, travelled with friends and alone.

This is going to be a looooooong post.

September 2011. By this time, I've been busy with completing my pre-employment requirements and turning over responsibilities. It felt very easy to leave Bayantrade. My friends have left before me and there have been a lot of unsettled issues I couldn't stand any longer. The company has changed radically - from the management, its name to ABM Global Solutions, even company emails, office transferred to Jupiter, Makati, work and relationships.

October 2011. Sir Jojo, my boss, was very happy I was moving. We both deemed it a career move. Something I wouldn't have a chance on in Bayantrade. It was a graceful exit, I must say. I didn't answer anything rash (but actually had to fill out another exit form) to HR. My last week was spent over a whole lot of despedidas. Dinners here and there. What I enjoyed most was the game night the boss organized. He brought his Guitar Hero and another colleague brought Kinect Adventures. Layers of pizza and bilaos of pancit abound. I felt very important and happy to leave.

Eight o'clock in the morning, at the 14th floor lounge, I sat alone in the coffee table enjoying my morning coffee. Despite feeling nervous and sick, I was very excited to start my new job. An hour later, my new boss arrived and welcomed me in. Then two guys went to get coffee and were introduced to me as my new colleagues. (Although right now I'm sure they went there to see and "rate" me.) I received my temporary ID, new set of office supplies, handshakes and warm welcome from everyone in the 17th floor. I had a good feeling I'll stay for long. (Still feel the same way right now too.)

November 2011. My first out-of-the-country trip. Malaysia, truly Asia. When my Malaysian Airlines flight landed, I was so excited to meet Marjanie, my super close friend whom I shared college problems with. He was with his wife, Nimsy, at the waiting area. I hugged the friend I haven't seen for five years. I missed him very badly and I missed the days we'd spent driving around the city, stopping over for milkshake and tempura. By the way, I was sent to Malaysia for a training. Honestly, I didn't get anything but experience. :P

The Petronas seemed like two lovers holding hands

I missed this guy. This was taken at One World Hotel in Selangor.

Malaysia was quite like the Philippines, except for the much improved infrastructure. The Petronas Towers and the park below it was overwhelming. The expressways and transportation system were amazing. Perhaps the only downside was the food. I was never fond of curry, coconut milk and all other foreign dishes. I resorted to McDonalds and KFC. At one dinner, which was hosted by our Malaysian colleagues, I ordered for carbonara. I couldn't eat anything else.

I wish McDonalds here has McBites. More tasty than nuggets.

December 2011. Sendong woke up each Kagay-anon with the sound of rushing water. Father recalled it was dark as electricity had been cut off the night before. Manila's weather was bad, but it was way worse in Cagayan de Oro. Morning came and dead bodies were sprawled on the streets. Houses were filled with mud, murky water and stinking smell. For two days, all I did was stare at my phone waiting for a single text message from my family back home. No electricity, water and telecom.

My flight for my annual leave was on the eve of Christmas. Usually, I would see fireworks and dancing lights from up in the airplane when approaching the City of Golden Friendship. That time, it was very different. Silence blanketed the air. When I arrived, I could see my sister, niece and uncle's faces lit up to see me. Oh yes, I still couldn't forget when they saw me in my new pixie haircut. From the airport, it felt nothing like Christmas. I went with Papa to the Misa de Gallo. Usually, the Cathedral would be filled with church-goers and merry songs of the Child.

We had our usual family get together but we made it simple and offered prayer and candles.

We had the usual feast on the table but left more than half to be brought to the evacuation center nearby. Long-distance relatives, neighbors and friends had nothing but each other's families to celebrate Christmas with.

Christmas morning, my sister and I prepared for the "Christmas on the Streets" organized by a lot of groups from the private sector, barkadas and families who had more to share. I went with my sister's company (of which I used to be connected with as well). Toys, clothes, food and other essentials were wrapped in Christmas wrappers, to be given to those affected. On board an Elf truck, we went to Balulang, Macasandig, Kauswagan and Carmen. It was a tearfully sad scene. Cars, houses and other properties were destroyed. Dreams were shattered.

Who says I'm ending my blog life?

Indeed, this is death. Without internet connection and the luxury of time to write about my escapades in life, certainly, this is suicide.

I miss the feeling of hitting the keys with my fingers continuously. I miss talking with friends over YM and Facebook chat. I miss viewing other blog posts and Multiply pictures. I miss sending and reading messages from Friendster.

Up to now, I am still struggling with the life I have. Life's never easy, especially when you're in my position.

Jeepney and MRT rides welcome me in the morning. Heavy traffic accompanies me when I go home. Sheesh!

Minutes of meetings, reprots, meetings, discussions, analyses, wastewater, World Bank, sewer connections, projects, Terms of Reference, contracts, Scope of Work, Bill of Quantities, project managers, Job Orders, contractors, consultants, negotiations, and this post will go endless.

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for tomorrow. I have decided.

Mom asked me: Niuyon jud ka sa imo work?

I honestly don't know what to answer to my mom. I like the work but I don't love it - maybe yet.

My workplace is in Bonifacio High Street. Yes, it's a high-end commercial complex. What I'm trying to say is that shops like Nine West, Nike and Speedo, and restaurants like Italliani's are located here. These establishments get crowded usually in the evening by the rich and sometimes the famous. The landscape, fountains and simply the atmosphere have left me in awe during my first day. So basically, I like the workplace.

BayanTrade is a conglomerate of six major multinational companies. By just enumerating the names like Aboitiz, Ayala, Benpres, JG Summit, PLDT and UNILAB, I couldn't help but be proud that I belong to this company. The career offer here is great. I can see myself grow and be nurtured by the development path oriented to me.

My colleagues also have very impressive attitude and profesionalism. Most of them are young and very dynamic graduates of UP, Silliman and all the other Ateneo schools in the country. The BayanTrade culture is very hopeful and competitive.

So here's the point.



I like everything but I don't seem to love what I'm really DOING right now. I am assigned in the business process outsourcing unit. I don't have any idea why, of all business units, GSDC suited well for me - as they might think. I'm not really sure about this. I mean I haven't had the passion to speak to people. I can talk, but I've always had butterflies when it comes to speaking with sense - and especially that what we speak must be very helpful to solve our clients' problems. This unit is supposed to provide customer support to foreign clients from the three bigger world regions - Asia Pacific, America and Europe.



Until now, I still don't feel confident about this job. I think I can do more if I'll be in marketing, human resources and other units which require sweat and a lot of sweat. Perhaps it's because I am more exposed to such kind of work rather than sitting comfortably infront of a computer. Yet, I have also realized that MAYBE this work will hone me more into a wholistic individual - that my skills will be more diverse and developed.





Bonne chance for me.

In a Strange Place

I wasn't really sure about coming to Manila for work. I never thought that I'd leave my hometown for a great job offer in a place where I had always seen on TV as crowded and filthy.

Manila isn't that bad at all. It's been a month since my first day, and I sort of like the place already. Yes, some places here smell bad. The traffic is very bad. My worst complain about here is that everything necessary is expensive! A hundred pesos is not enough for the whole day. I have asked myself how can I survive in a place like this.

I used to walk home from school. I used to go home for lunch so that I could save some amount of money. I used to go to malls without a peso in my pocket. I would hang out with my barkada and not worry about spending too much. Because back at home, spending too much meant spending my money's worth.

Here in Manila, I always worry - what to eat, where to go and how to make use of my time. All those worries with another thought of how to get over those with spending only less.

Now, somehow I have gotten over those worries. I have learned how to struggle and survive from those struggles. I just wish that soon, I will have him with me here in this strange place.

Hmmm...What would I Write About?

5:50 in the morning. Just ten minutes before I log off my PC. Waiting for time to pass, wanting to write but too tired to think of anything.

Officemates are already standing up, too excited to finally go home and hit the bed. After eight hours of work, I can't wait to go to my place and sleep beside my Prince Charming. Nothing to worry about. I don't have to hurry. No film and practicum classes. What a relief.

Six minutes left. The sky outside slowly welcomes the rising sun. I wonder where that sun is. It's been a long time since we've met. It's been days already when the surrounding is still shady when I walk for home. I miss the sun. By the time I wake up, I can't have the chance to look at it the way it beautifully looks in the morning. The wind might be blowing it away. Yes, I've been suffering from cold nights and mornings. And I have been suffering from warm afternoons. Nothing offered to me in between.

Three minutes. The office becomes noisy as first-shifters arrive. Obviously, they have gotten the privilege of bathing while I take my baths the afternoons. After work, after classes, After sleeping. I don't have a fixed schedule anymore. My body clock seems to...

It's six in the morning. Good morning to everyone!